Dear Men (Single and Taken),
Yes, I am addressing this letter to both committed and not committed men, because this seems to be a subject that involves you no matter if you are single or in a relationship. A little about me, I am 32, educated, funny, charming, hella cute and single AF. As most single girls now a days I am on a few dating apps, trying to find a half decent guy to date, however those seem quite hard to find now a days. I always think I am the only one who can’t seem to find love, but sadly I hear it from my friends on a daily basis. Today as I was driving to work and listening to my favorite show on 106.7, “Johnny’s House” one of the DJ’s, Marissa, was saying how she was done with online dating after another stupid message from a guy and I wanted to scream at the radio “I KNOW EXACTLY HOW YOU FEEL!”.
Listen up boys (yes boys, because you don’t even deserve being called men) its time to step up your game! Why have you all become so lazy? It’s like you want everything handed to you on a silver platter, and on the first date. What happened to the days of courting a girl, opening doors, calling a girl? Didn’t your mommas teach you better?! Boy do I miss those days! When did being rude become your MO? More and more do the conversations become about sex that actually getting to know someone. Trust me, I don’t need an app to get laid, trust me, thats the easy part, and if you need one in order to find a piece of ass then you need to re-evaluate your life. Please note that writing a girl and asking for nudes without saying even hello, is NOT OK. Actually while we are on the topic of nudes, just don’t ask for them! Let that be up to us if we want to send you one or not. What is it with talking about sex from the first sentence you send? Trust me its not sexy! Also, what happened to asking a girl out on a date? If one more guy asks me to come over without even having met me I will have to punch someone. Honestly, you have no idea how far you would get with a girl by just asking her out! Make an effort to get to know us, having a guy interested in what you have to say is one of the biggest turn ons!
Married and men in relationships, STOP GOING ON DATING APPS. It is 100% not ok no matter the circumstances. Don’t ask me to be your side chick, don’t ask me to join you and your girl, its not happening. Please respect the women you are with, and if you are not happy (chances are she ain’t either) be decent enough to speak with her and either breaking things off or work on them. Think of your mothers, sisters, daughters, would you want someone treating them like that? I don’t think so.
Last, but certainly not least, STOP with the ghosting, honestly, whats the point? It’s like you guys get off on hooking a girl and then disappearing. We are grown women, if you are not interested tell us, we will survive I promise. But there is nothing worse than thinking that you finally met a good one, for him to just disappear into thin air with no explanation. Yes, you don’t owe us anything, but again a little decency and respect would be greatly appreciated.
Now, single ladies that read me, you are not getting off quite easily either, as we are all guilty of committing some of these faux pauxs. Don’t be rude, don’t be shady, and don’t give us that are actually looking for something serious a bad reputation. But most importantly respect yourselves, because if we don’t, they sure as hell won’t. Stop making it easy for them to get into your pants, make them work for it, I would like to believe it will be worth it in the long run.
Here is to never losing hope, and to hopefully finding one of the good ones.
Nikki Arnold says
Yes girl preach!!!! I love this letter and if only relationships were built how they were in the good old days!!! I’m going to raise my boys to do things properly for sure.